MEIN KAISA MAR GAYA

DISCLAIMER: All characters appearing in this blog post are fictitious. Any resemblance to the dead, imaginary and even to the real personalities including the aliens based at Mars, Europa and beyond the galaxies are (KENTT - Shudh Pani) purely coincidental.
                                           " MEIN KAISA MAR GAYA " 
                                                        - What the funk ???

This blog post is a based on a true love story which took place at the heart of the Dolakpur town in Chotta Bheem state and exactly as the clock strucked 25:00 hours on February 30, 2013.

Ahditya Kashyap: Gheet, I am so sorry... I should not have left you just like that.

Gheet Dhillon: Do you know Tommy ? the stray dog on my street end, today it went berserk and scared the Bumbleema aunty (Laughs hysterically). Arey, i forgot to tell you about Bumbleema aunty, Bumbleema aunty is Dumbleema aunty's elder sister's son in law's cousin's mother in law's sister who really don't like Tommy. Got it ? Ok, tell me now what was that you were talking about and why sorry ???

Ahditya: FORGET IT and you sound so dull, what happened Geet ?

(Dull ? Audience found scratching their heads)

Gheet: heyyy, I totally forgot to complete the Bumbleema's Dumbleema aunty story, achcha listen...On...

(Ahditya interrupts)
Ahditya: Listen Gheet, if you are keep on talking like this probably we will be completing the film only after its 8th part, so cut it short...

Gheet: OK ! I am upset because that idiot corrupted my heart and cheated me.
Ahditya: Which idiot ? and corruption ? there are plenty. which one ? you mean 2G? Common Wealth? Coal Gate? Chopper scam?
Gheet: You stupid, I was talking about Anshuwoman. I have told you na, the guy whom i loved during the college days.
Ahditya: I believe it must be in plural form, 'GUYS'?

Gheet: Yes, it was some 5-10 guys. As 99% percent of them ran away before I introduce myself, Anshuwoman is the only guy who was hearing all my words for weeks.
Ahditya: Oh just weeks (mind voice: probably it was his ear phones which saved him)

Ahditya: So what happened now?
Gheet: That idiot cheated me, he promised that he will marry me, but now he says that he cannot marry me as his dad sold him for better price to a business magnate's daughter.

Ahditya: Phew and he survived (Headphones must have committed suicide.)

Gheet: Ahdi ? You there ? reply, else i will start the marathon on Bumbleema's dumbleema aunty.

Ahditya: In a span of micro seconds with scared tone (I ammm Hearinggg everythinggggg....)

Gheet: Hmm...

Ahditya: Lets call him up and scold him real bad.
Gheet: Good idea, but you call him and put him in a conference call.
Ahditya: (As expected) OKAY SURE !!! (anything to avoid the speech on Bumbleema)
Gheet: It's ringing...
Ahditya: I have ears, they are not dead yet.--------------------------------------
Tring Tring....
Ahditya: Hello Anshuwoman?? Gheet wants to have some words with you.
Anshuwoman: Oh Plzz don't dooo....
Gheet: Halo Anshuwomen!!!!!!

Anshuwoman: haha, i was Missing you Gheet and I am glad that you spoke. Was that Ahditya ?
Gheet: Yes, he is...
Anshuwoman: (I will kill him if i happen to seem him) Tell me Gheet whatsapp? but please not about the Bumbleema aunty again.

Gheet: I wanted to tell you something...

Anshuwoman: Anything but please not about Bumbleema aunt's story please, i beg you.

Gheet: hahaha. Youuu Bosstarddddd... You bloody black hole...

Anshuwoman: huh, excuse me ? Gheet ?

Gheet: you son of a witch and father of a pitch. You will leave me at the restaurant without paying the bills and you expect me to clean the tables for what I had there ?
Gheet: You are the loser, know why ? because i will not share you anything about my bumbleema aunt's story.

Anshuwoman: (Mind voice: Thank god) but Gheet sorry...
Gheet: You will rot in the IRCTC website at all the time while booking a ticket. you are such a pathetic black hole and FUNK you Anshuwoman.
Anshuwoman: huh ? Gheet ? you are talking too much. Can you give back the money i spent for recharging your mobile ? Gheet ?
HANGS UP.

Gheet: I feel so relaxed Ahdi.. Thank you so much, I don't know what to gift you, probably Dumbleema aunty's story ?
Ahditya: Awwwwww.... Gheet, its ok. Thank you so much... (Phew)
GheetL I wanna tell you something Ahdi.

Ahditya: Go ahead Gheet (Horn sound at closer distance)
Gheet: I love you so much than bumbleema, dumbleema and the Tommy on my street.
I love you Ahditya and waited for this day to break it.Dhoom, Damal (pounding noise)

Gheet: Ahdi ? you there ? Something broken?

--------------------------------------

                      
Image: Carlsontoons.com
Camera Shifts to Ahdi's location:SUSPENSE MUSIC and ULTRA SLOW MOTION
(Even Gheet was found slower while talking)

Ahdi was found unconscious lying in a pool of blood and the sign board said "AVOID USE OF MOBILE WHILE DRIVING."

Gheet still believes that Ahdi would come back some day to hear the rest of the Dumbleema Bumbleema's story.

Anshuwoman is settled in his life and works as a butler in a Diary milk (he just hates 5 star) hotel.

MORAL:Though Ahdi was saved from Bumbleema, Dumbleema aunties boring story he was not lucky enough to save his life (plz keep your face sad)

He has been transferred to the heaven as a reward for his patience and holding the world record for staying in a relationship with Gheet for more than a week. Ignoring the warning signs have just costed Ahdi's life. 

This is "Mein Kaise Mar Gaya' story of Ahditya Kashyap who lost his life while talking(seldom he talks but always hears) to Gheet Dhillon over the phone.

 'Never ignore the warning signs provided before you' is the moral of the story conveyed by Ahditya Kashyap and never have an over talkative partner can also be considered as the moral number 2.

Ahditya Kashyap's official entry for the Indiblogger and Colgate "The Moral of the Stroy is..." Contest :D Click 'em if you wish to contribute your moral :D 

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3 kinda people in Facebook

There are only 3 kinda people in your Facebook friend list

1) People who likes your update but never 'LIKE' it because they don't like you.

2) People who always 'LIKE' your updates (without even understanding it) just because they like you pretty much.Finally

3) People who likes both your updates and yourself but never hit a 'LIKE' just because they don't LIKE 'you' going popular with their friend list.

P:S- A specific breed is there who never 'sign' in to FB and who always stay offline in chat, updates can be seen once in a blue moon and they say they created FB profile for socializing.

Bwahahahaha :D

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Dr Robo- Neural Network Specialist

Three laws of robotics as prescribed by Isaac Asimov 
1) Robot should not injure human being even through it's inaction.
2) Robot should obey the orders given by human beings except the orders conflicting with the first law.
3) Robot must protect its own existence without conflicting the above two laws.

These ethics sound so cool for the 'Robots' which can be in no way a threat to the human beings, as i was watching my super star's 'Endhiran-2010' film, Chitti(robot) would perform an operation perhaps performs treatments on a woman suffering in labor pain. Finally it comes out in flying colors by saving both mother and child, can that be possible in future ?
Well, to be frank decades back telephones and cameras are two different entities and our folks never expected them to exists together to solve their purpose.Similarly, decades after who knows we can have an hospital entirely run by the robots and just monitored by humans as we do with the CCTV footage.

Let it be, lets talk about some history now...
I am a sincere believer in 'SIDDHARS' than gods, Siddhars are said to be the intellectual saints who can perform all the miracles from medicine to tele-transmission and time travelling.

To be honest, they are the pioneers in medical field and what happened to the medicine system as prescribed by them to solve the complications on today's world ?
We the human being eyes currency in every good/bad practices, which made the system developed by the Siddhars to fall under scanner since so many bogus people are trying to utilize the name of Siddhars to earn in bunch.
                                       
                                                        Image:Varmahealing.com                        

I have read in few books that centuries ago there was a practice in Tamil Medicine where people would soak rice in medicinal extracts from plants before injecting the rice in to person's body. Though the use of rice as injection in ancient world was uncertain, if practiced without proper steps it would be a dangerous method to treat complications.
Centuries ago, the lifestyle of people were so different and there were plenty of diseases which makes people to die at the age of 60 or before however few strong bodies surpassed hundred years of age and still some continues the feat.

If we raise a question, Will the same practice will be enough to save lives of today's and tomorrow's ? Probably NO would be the majority of answer. 

IF YOU ARE USING A SAME MEDICINE TO TREAT A BACTERIAL INFECTION FOR DECADES, CERTAINLY THE BACTERIA WOULD ADAPT AND DEVELOP IT CONDITIONS TO SURVIVE THE MEDICINE YOU ARE ADMINISTERING TO DESTROY IT. TRUE ?

I guess so, we develop and shape our self according to the situation.

Coming back to our topic, ROBOTS as DOCTORS.
Well according to the internet "The da Vinci robot, a system that allows a surgeon to work across the room from a patient while directing robotic arms via controls and a video display. It received FDA approval in 2000 as the first comprehensive robotic system for laparoscopic surgery. "
Quite promising for the topic that we were discussing at the start :D

                
                                                     Image:biomed.edu

Modern day healthcare equipped with robots are dealing as many as 5 major fields in Medical world and more in research laboratory awaiting a human's nod.
According to me, Robots are the future humans if they are fielded in Medical world.
Though there exists some struggles as it exists in all fields, if the struggles are battled by the strongest, sharpest human minds. Robots can play a crucial role in Touching the lives of Humans.

Considering the growing population and evolving diseases, Robots with better precision can certainly be a groundbreaking invention to deal the piling diseases and patients. Besides, more training programs and training institutes to sharpen the minds must be pursued to add Elixir to the metals. One such institute I am aware of is Apollo institute of Robotic Surgery at Chennai. If and only if awareness on trying to shift the medical practices to advanced level is followed, we can find the freedom we long for better living and worry free lives scrapping the scare raised by the man-killing diseases and that's make it perfect to write 'health is wealth.'

Only two fields after the evolution of man kind has witnessed drastic development,
1)Telecommunication
2)Health sector

The first one facilitates people to connect people apart from boundaries which is quite essential and the latter one is helpful to deal the complication in facilitating contact between the organs concealed in our body limit.
Without the proper working of communication between our organs, no other communication can neither be received nor be transmitted at ease.

However, there should not be any compromise in precision or care shown by the machines to save the lives. Such technologies can save hundreds of lives and the cost of such treatments would certainly be costly to treat all souls. If the precision factor and cost factor are properly dealt with the Robotic Surgeries, am 200% sure. More lives can be saved at less pressure.

Submitted for-
How does modern healthcare touch lives ???
hosted by
Indiblogger and Apollo hospitals.
More at - http://www.apollohospitals.com/cutting-edge.php

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A Day In Fman's Life

""There exists no great difference between the dead fishes in the basket and the very alive fisherman who caught it unless and until the latter one manages to reach the shore.""

- S Deepak Karthik @Nagapattinam 

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Scrutinizing The Scraps - I

Protests everywhere.
Protests for passing a bill, protests not to pass a bill, protests against protest and protests for protests.
Finally, What's the very purpose of such protests?
As quoted in a Robin Sharma's book 

"It is just like dying to have a long journey in a sports utility vehicle but with zero amount gas in it."

Problem with Indians is not the deficiency of wit and capability to solve, it exists only with the way of handling an issue. Instead of increasing our productivity for 100 bucks we would import goods for 200 bucks. This is the lone problem India faces in each and every issue.

Sensible protests, do we have any ?
It took years for our forefathers to get rid of the white folks from our soil. We can repeat such successful attempts only if we have PERSEVERANCE.
Of what use is the stuff like using high class vocabulary to display an issue in the social networking sites? So is that all for the  sake of gathering likes and getting shares.
If so, It is shameful than committing a crime.

Time and again, as an unfortunate gruesome incident occurs, our people tries to vomit their inward feelings in the form of texts.
At end of the day, people likes and praises the author and the story ENDS there.
It never takes a step beyond that. Even with the great journalists, their thesis on a striking issue just goes with the paper and air.

My sincere requests to great groups and sites with classic bloggers accommodating it.
This is no trending topic to have a marathon of posts.
Lets behave little matured and not only on the incidents of sexual crimes, there are plenty more worrisome acts grilling India.

If we need a change and a full stop for the issues, showcasing our rage would never solve our worries.
Unfortunately we are in a republic nation.
Eyes on elections but do we have any potential Politicians ????

To be Continued.... 

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'SIR' Jadeja Revealed

I was an IGNORANT IDIOT but not anymore....

I was struggling with a post ' LINK ' Why Jadeja is being called as Sir Sri Ravindra Jadeja and at last I found out the much expected answer on the Saturday night's match between Chennai Super Kings and Royal Challengers at Jadejapauk.

Here I share you the answer from our Indian Cricket Team Captain...
"MYSTERY REVEALED."


                          

Apart from the Jokes, he is a fantastic cricketer to accept the teasers on him.
Certainly he deserves the knighthood :)

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12- A Taxonomy Of Guys

After a successful (which means no backlash) for the post "12- A Taxonomy Of Girls"
I would like to extend my service for my own community. Coming up next in the arena its "12- A Taxonomy Of Guys." I confess that I don't practice psychology or Physiology :P and whatever written here is just on a funny note.

All characters mentioned here are on Imaginary basis, not to hurt any soul even in MARS ;)


1)  Sir Alex Ferguson- According to these bunch of guys, they are the roman god for Football. These self acclaimed football fanatics would never give a damn for what's going on in their home but these people are so so much obsessed on following(idolizing) a game happening far away from their home. These guys would intentionally involve themselves in either defending an Argentinian player or accusing a Portuguese player. If you go to their Face book page, their cover photo, display image and perhaps their underwear would also symbolize some football club. Because they want the world to know that they are superstars in following football.

2) Johnny Bravo- As the name suggests, The very existence of such guys in social media or anywhere could only be felt after seeing their comments on a girl's picture, status or whatever a girl updates. According to them, they can attract all kind of girls. Confident boys with extravagant womanizing skills(at times they succeed else SLAP).

3) Mounmohan Sing- Should I explain further? such guys are gift for Women fraternity, you scold him, slap him and praise him, their reply will be the same for all kind of inputs.
Teek Hai :P

4) Digvijay Singh- These guys would pose like an IRON MAN, they would try express some strong comments on a sensitive issue. But, whatever comes out of their mouth goes funny. Even if they say something serious, it would go as funniest joke ever heard.

5) Goswami- 'Still you have not answered my question Mr.Mukherjee' 'The whole nation is waiting for your answer'. Remember such phrase ?
If there comes a time when you would feel that being a dumb is better, that could be possibly the time you converse with such guys. They never let you talk neither argue but all they need is an answer. Such guys are made to host 24X7 talk shows.

6) Eminems- You can spot such guys in public transport. Headphones, funky t shirts and nodding their heads for freak beats. Posters everywhere in their room, some freaking hairstyles and all that they breath would be some alien songs. According to them they are Eminem and Ice cube.

7) Kalams & TATAs- ENDANGERED SPECIES. Good guys are always tough to find, with a benevolence in heart and a smile in face. Even white crows can be spotted, tough to find such handsome guys. 

8) Superman- As you guess, these superman's would sport a typical outfit. Half of them wanna display that they bought a jockey underwear for 500 bucks or much more. Most of such idiots by adding fuel to the fire, wears a contrast pant and thereby entertaining everyone.

9) Rahul Gandhis- 
Q- "Do you have license?"
Ans- "Mere paas maa hai"
q- "Did you do your home work?"
Ans- "Mere paas maa hai"I have a friend in this category, without his mom's nod he wont come out to play or hang out.
I pity at a poor girl :P

10) Pink Floyds-
No no, these guys are not rock stars. These guys have some pink in their blood. You can find them gossiping about some unnecessary stuffs, probably watching soap operas and weeping all the day and some hysterical laughs as that of an actress in their face :PWhy not, can find a dazzling nail polish in their fingers ? Probably, powerpuff girls sticker in their room. Intricate womenarisms would be pursued by them ;)

11) Salman Khans- These guys have got nothing to do with Salman Khan, just a name to indicate their flaunting character. If they are watching a match, they would pour some bull shit which they don't even follow. Finally, even if these guys gotta take call for peeing, they would tag them in a Facebook check in.

12) Lallu Yadavs- What to say about these guys, extraordinary sense of humor can make you smile at any position. if you jave such friend who would insult himself for cracking an awesome joke, i confess that you are damn lucky to have such one in your group. Wherever these guys go, they grab a bunch of people with their humorous attitude. 

Finally done with the 12, you scold me or slap me but please don't ask which category i FALL in to :)
Take it on lighter note and do check this 12 Taxonomy.

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Why Jadeja - SIR Ravindra Jadeja ???

Who created the world ?
Was that god or science.
Most debated and unsolved mystery....

Next to that, here is another question so popular in recent times.
Why Jadeja is called as SIR Ravindra Jadeja ???

No Idea, sir ji.

Even Google doesn't know it.
Why mentioning Google, Even the queen Elizabeth has no clue of awarding the knighthood as she is doubting herself with Schizophrenia.



Let's take a quick look about SIR's achievement.

1) In 2012, Jadeja became the eighth player and the first Indian player to score three first-class 300's in his career.
2) Under Virat Kohli's captaincy, Jadeja played a crucial role in lifting the U-19 world cup 2008 at Malaysia.
3) Forget not about the IPL, playing for Rajasthan in first season. Jaddu played to his potential to help Rajasthan to score a debut title.

Irrespective of all his merriest achievements.
He is the most trolled player on social media, The latest victim for bandwagon.
But none knows the ORIGIN of his name :P 

So if you know the answer, please make a comment :D

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Airtel Super Shits

Uncle Sam wants you to join Army ?
Hell no, as of now uncle Sam wants you to join super singer show.

Hardly, there would be a soul without knowing Airtel super singer in South.
No matter whether you know Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Dha Ni Sa or Sa Ni Dha Pa Ma Ga Ri Sa, if you are participating in that specific show, you can be compared with LEGENDS.

In a surprising turn, Indian Army is planning for a very similar selection process as that of Super Singer. Geologists are in high doubt that whether Ganga would be a perennial river flowing all the months of a year but they are pretty sure about the perennial telecast of Super singer (Junior, senior, super senior, sub junior) all around the year.Indian army, which is knows for its tough selection process, now it is very much jealous of the Super Singer team for their much tougher procedures.

They would keep some plenty of rounds ranging from A to Z and in all of a sudden, they would keep the ELIMINATION rounds. which is nothing but to keep the TRP rating on a high note and over again they would call the eliminated jokers for a wild card round.

Of all, the excited parents with full of anxiety will pose as if their kids are on the verge of dead sea and king cobra. Perhaps it will look like an acting competition rather than a singing. you can see people crying, hugging and fighting as well. With the presence of 2 or more ASS lickers aka anchors, whose job is to do nothing than grease the participants and the so called gods(Judges) with some super dumb jokes.

To speak about our JUDGES, who find themselves went through a perfect machining system to come out as a tuned play back singers. They would do all the possible acts to keep the viewers on toe.

'Sruthi Sari illa'
'Sushmitha Sari illa'You have to practice a lot and so on sugary appraisals all the way from the music gods.
No one knows about the motive of the show in between there would be some spats to hike the viewers rating.

The scene of such drama would go like as if the SINGING habit is a vital to survive the world and by forgetting the fact that these people are singing the very old songs perfectly executed by the legends, everyone jumps.

Where such things are leading to?
Already there are dozen boring serials with the same theme of making the viewers to cry is on full swing, besides such reality craps including the dancing freaks are certainly annoying a section of viewers. Besides, the kids participating the show are given a feel of celebrity touch, which turns them to act superior psychologically. Plenty of occurrence could be noted as the show off teasers.

Television has got a power that can change people to an extent.
with such conventional craps, it certainly annoys a section of people who hate grinding the same stuffs all over the year.

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