12- A Taxonomy Of Girls

Disclaimer- I have never pinned a disclaimer tag to any of my posts, but this one is going to be an exception, i am going to take a DIG at worlds beautiful creatures.
Before i begin this post, i request you to read it and ignore it asap. 
don't take it personally :) - Smile !
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AS everyone knows, when it comes for "visible physical beauty", Women are the most beautiful creatures.
Actually beauty cant be seen but only can be felt by experiencing right?
Beauty which is visible and a beauty which has got a form can only live for short time but a formless, unseen, invisible beauty which is felt by being together has no expiry date.
Ex:Beauty of a Mother, Beauty of a Sister and Beauty of a Friend (and so on).

Women, Be it mother, grandma, Aunt, elder sister, younger sister, friend, wife, girl friend.
Whatever the relation is, World without a women (excluded for bachelors) will be like a house without windows.
But i feel like, "all that roars are not LION."
So as you have guessed, i am going to blabber something about the kinds in beautiful creatures.
Before that i accept, i am NO Salman Khan neither Vishwanadhan anandh but an useless rogue, so bear with me and please don't ask me Are you SRK to comment on us? Certainly i don't need to be a SRK to comment.

Here we go with the 12 types:
Why 12? 12 is considered to be a complete number, 12*2 Hours and 12 days etc :)


1) Hello 911?:
I have plenty of friends on this category, i guess that you people have guessed them with their title.
Ring Ring...
911 Girl -"Where can we download MP3 and anti virus software for free?", "Suggest some site?"
Boy-"Yeah, try out these sites 1).... 2 )... 3)..., am sure it will help you"
Boy-"Hello? Hello, you there?"

What do you expect ? they have got what they wanted and asked for, so why should they stay on line ?
These kinda girls will reach us only when they need us.Typical 911 kinds.Can't blame them, Most of human being irrespective of gender and color will fall in to this kind.

2) "Geet" Dhillon:
Geet Dhillon sounds familiar huh ? that's the name of the character Kareena played in Jab we met.
*Boy-"Ha..(An Incomplete Halo)"
Geet Dhillon-"Yeah, i was in class, you know Preeti na? "that tall and fair girl" i hate her... SHE is a Show off case re, she bought a new sandals and she walked with that for plenty of times, she thinks that she is the cutest girl in the globe, i am going to ask my dad to but me a similar sandals, i will also walk like her, LOL then lets see what she do hah-aha", yeah and i totally forgot that, "WHY DID YOU CALLED me ?"

*Boy- by that time, an Automated voice says,"We have disconnected your call since your account balance reached NIL amount, kindly recharge to continue our service".

3) Bubbles:
My favorite character on Power puff girls :D (am not watching now, i was once), damn cute and childish. these kinda types are adorable but pretty hard to survive with.
Cartoon characters ranging from Tom and Jerry to etc, you can see all of those characters in their Bags, Slippers, hair pins and whatever they hang with. even they will gift their boy friend a pink underwear :D
instead of spending time on watching Cartoon network, you can watch these kinds.Delicate creatures to deal with. 

4) Fancy Rani:
As Jhansi Rani for bravery these Fancy rani's are for mobile parlors, obviously it is their personal stuff to take care of what they are, we are none to embrace or object it.
It is damn hard to write an exam, when you have such kind of girl writing before you, NO I DINT MEAN that way, i meant that the PERFUME SMELL will be intolerable.
Even invigilator will not near us. YIN-YANG :)
You can see such girls in college canteen, while we cross them "We can hear some high class English stuff, once we reach a far place Local language will resume".

5) AIR(All India Radio):
Gossip goddess alias AIR, Cannot keep any secret as secret, best choice to create awareness... Prefix "Don't tell this to anyone" and say her a secret, am sure in a matter of minutes, OBAMA will reach you and ask about that.
Never mess with her, if you do so "Your name will dwell in TIMES NOW".


6) Miss Cunningham:
No, as they name suggest they are not an Irish neither a Scot, but certainly CUNNING.
Years back she would have asked you for a favor but in your busy schedule you could have missed that.
Years later, when you reach her for a help.

She- "Do you remember the eve of 2005 Jan 4th?" i asked you a favor, you dint help me at that time. but now you want me Help you ? i am sorry :D


7) Phoolan Devi:
Bandit queens, according to them... All men are disgusting creatures, Some men are Rapist and few men are eve teasers and very very few men are leeches.
They will forget that their dad, brother are men.

Straight away they will talk(scold) like Arnab Goswami.
Self acclaimed feminist, if you see a women you are harassing her, if you talk against a women you are a male chauvinist and certainly when you stand against them "you are a disgusting creatures"/ Ignore such.

8) Pseudo "Reita Faria":
As many of you know, Rita Faria is first Indian to win the Miss world contest(1966), am not taking any DIG at physical appearance.

Just read it and try to understand
"Kind of mobile that she owns will be a very basic, meek model(example Nokia 1100) but the kind of HYPE and SCENE she creates will be like that of an Apple iPhone user".
Gotcha ?Self obsessed girls. According to them,if you look at her means you are trying to hook her.

9) Miss Bannerjee:
Imagine that such kind of people sets a question paper and She likes Nehru very very much. Then question they set will look like.

1)Choose the correct option from the below, Name the father of our nation?
A) Nehru. B) Select option A. C)Select option B. D) All the above.
They will show only one finger and will ask you to select one among finger, you have got NO OPTION but to abide by her.
Dominates, Dominates and Dominates.




10) Doubt-fire:
These kinda people will never trust you for anything even for 50 Paise, when you ask her name, you are trying to take an advantage over her.
When you help her at tough situation, she will say thank you and right after that SHE TURNS IN TO A COMA patient, who will act like NOTHING HAS HAPPENED earlier.
Will look every Men as FOX.

I hate such crappy kinds to the core, cant blame them but they are too cautious.

11) Bitches:

It is unfair to call a girl as BITCH, when a guy who makes fun by being together with plenty of girls,still he is praised and portrayed positively as a PLAYBOY.
But When a girl commits the same work, she is excluded and yelled as BITCH.
UNFAIR. Lets start "Save Bitches" campaign.



12)100%:

Last but not least, these kinda people are 100% friendly, 100% understanding, 100% funny, 100% Brave and 100% lucky to be with.
If you have such person with you, i must say you are the luckiest among any other creatures, a true symbol of feminine.
I have plenty of friends, aunt and sister from this kind. i must confess i am lucky :)

                                       

I repeat, i dint scribble this to hurt anyone's feelings, if it looks so "My sincere apologies for that", don't take it personally, if you hate it...
Kindly clear your history and while commenting Don't mean or ask anything personally like WHAT TYPE I FALL INTO? :D

Just had a weird spark to write on and so i did.


Read and Ignore :)
Thanks for your patience.
 

125 comments:

  1. bwahahaha... :D I laughed badly after reading this blog of yours.. extremely funny... and yea honestly these kind of girls do exist and I hate them too!! :) Great post... loved it.. May the force give you the strength to bear the bashes you will be receiving in some time..!!:P

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  2. fun post..nice read..
    i am afraid that i am hurt by you modesty and repeated disclaimers... :| ..it spoils a bit fun...but up to you if you want to keep people happy..
    it was fairly comprehensive too and i will take 2 hours before i could add even a sub category..however with 100% i don't agree...i believe its the love in the relation that makes it 100% for every single category....whom ever you love is always 100% .. so if i fall in love with a chatty girl, i will find her 100%...anyways my views...
    nice post ...had fun..try to write about guys...and if i dont see you disclaimer that time i will be offended ;)

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  3. Nice post. I am sure we can put some more points cos I honestly believe there are many more types. for eg.
    13. The Gold digger (not literally, type 14 maybe)
    The ones who'll befriend their boyfriend's(or ex's) friends and keep on digging out backstage and personal information.

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  4. Honest, creative and humorous.

    On a slight different note: This ladka ladki thing is sometimes too much, we can be a person first then split into male and female.

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  5. hahaha!! I laughed so hard. :D:D
    That is some research you have done or maybe personal experience? :P
    I had to ditch my ex-girlfriend coz she promptly falls into the Doubt-fire category. ;-)
    I have to say excellent post bro, a bit generic but these kinds do exist!

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  6. Jaha_panah tussi great ho....towfah kabul koro ♥ .......hilarious at its bestest goodest...!!!!one of the best post...i hav read ...ingenious wrk bro , u really have a grt understanding of women... :) :D

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  7. Insanely creative post....
    One of your bests. :)

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  8. haha very funny and i mean it in a sarcastic way .. so u have pulled a "wat's ur rashi?" in a different tone though... I liked the funny side to it but u really cant categorize each girl to one of those 12 types, u know even bitches can be 100% or doubt-fires can be bubbles!! ;) :)

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  9. You are not married, Dee, it is obvious, you are way too brave. Very well written!

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  10. Frankly i didnt expect the outcome to be so humorous! FAB JOB! na entha cateogry nanba :D

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  11. @Nitin VermaTrue Nitin... we will be having more numbers then, so to shorten i reduced and Thanks a ton

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  12. @Akshay Kumar Gglad and good feel while reading your comment (always) thank you bro

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  13. @NehaThanks Neha.. what you said is 100$ true

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  14. As usual funny and light weight ;)

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  15. Experience speaks well Deepak! :-)

    BTW, I could not comment easily on your post. Had to resort to "reply" for one of the comments.:-(
    The Publish button is not visible on my screen.

    Pattu/
    Vetrimagal

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  16. @VetrimagalNandri :)
    browser problem ah irukkalam :) enakku antha mari prob vanthathu illa :) i ll chk any how :) thanks

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  17. Was a funny post to read ..Every time I read a type..I could picture out at least one of my friends in each category!
    you are a good observer though
    nice post!

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  18. "World without a women (excluded for bachelors) will be like a house without windows."...."Excluded for bachelors" was necessary...well done... ;)
    anyways...at once I thought I was reading someone's Ph.D. thesis...good one Deepak...why not try a Ph.D. on this topic...lolzzz... :P

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  19. hahaha... nice classification :) enjoyed reading

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  20. Wonder which category I fall into???

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  21. ROFL...
    Dude, i wonder how do you get these weird thoughts to write. Excellent. Love reading each of your posts. Great work buddy.

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  22. you shouldn't have been sorry for the post... it was darn funny to read and kinda relate my own friends to them! Very creative post!

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  23. I know a lot of guys who're cunning and fall into the hello 911 category, they just come to me for help and then disappear, they don't even humor me before doing that :D but some of these types are true like the Geet dhillon types, I do not fall under that category coz I'm really shy and don't talk much but I have friends who are always talking about this n that n mostly themselves, they do not even pause to consider if I want to say something too.

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  24. Great funny post Deepak. I think you have done a great research in selecting the names for each type.

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  25. I donno about the girl kinds but You are a very tough guy...:-)

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  26. Deepak, have you thought about majoring in Psychology instead of Engineering???? LOL it was quite funny. I am sure girls have more than 12 taxonomic categories for boys!But yes, the "bitch" thing is sad- girls are at the receiving end of a lot of unfair things!! I like Bubbles too- but look at it from the Power Puff angle- they pack a lot of punch!!!

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  27. That's good research deepak..love the way u described..
    I have came across all those 12 types among girls..
    I guess u can try writing on boys too coz it will come
    more than 12 pts..oops..am not feminist or egostic
    Keep writing

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  28. HI Karthi, well done again, after a long week I laughed for a long time, along with my 4 site members :) And the most funniest thing is that, two of them suddenly got up from their place and walk away, may be they felt that we are gonna categorize them to two of that 12 types, or may be they understood what their category is :) Any ways well done !!

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  29. @The madrasiThanks a ton :) thanks for following my blog....

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  30. @CYNOSUREPh.D ?? :P :D yeah bro... must have tried :) with your blessing Mr.Maths

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  31. @MohurLOL:) as i said.. i don't classify my friends in Blogosphere :) Thanks for the read...

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  32. @Rajyalakshmi VathyamYAH :) correct.. am not sorry :) glad to hear that... TY ji :)

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  33. @radsThats great to know abt you Rads:) i must have had a 13th type named RADS :D

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  34. @Meera SundararajanYeah madam, i regret for selecting Engineering... must have tried Arts :( thanks for the Honest read :) glad...

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  35. @krutikaSURE MAYA:) as you said.. i ll give a try.. Thanks :)

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  36. @theaterbalconyThank you so much yaar :) nice to read your comment... are your frds upset ?

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  37. :D :D Very funny Dee(not you dude, your post! Or err you through your post?);D

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  38. Very funny ha ha....You asked us not to but cant help wondering which category I fall into ha ha...Good One :)

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  39. You inded have a lot of knowledge on the types of girls :)

    Bikram's

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  40. Hahaha..seriously loved this post!..I'm a girl and I'm saying this..:D..I think u've done sm super research..which category do u think I belong to? :D

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  41. really enjoyed Deepak :) and yes all that roars are not LION

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  42. Very Funny Blog..
    Wish u shd get a Wife within 1 to 11th category :P:P:P So that life long u ll keep blogging LOL:D :D And we will keep on reading

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  43. bah! Bt I laughed and smiled and laughed again!

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  44. Lovely post Deepak; As always your classifications are 100% correct. Good analysis and great sense of humor

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  45. hahahaha ROFL :D I loved the categorization specially bubbles ROFL hillarious post :D

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  46. Another funny compilation of yours in your own unique style, loved reading it

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  47. vei vei bad classification :P :P :P nee nejammmmma MOSAMAANAVAN dha :P :P had fun :) laafed a lot :P
    ** PERFUME SMELL will be intolerable** happens wid guys too. THE AXE EFFECT :P :P
    **We can hear some high class English stuff, once we reach a far place Local language will resume** dis s osssssssssum :) :) totally fun post :) :)

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  48. i think this was one of your best posts...thoroughly enjoyed reading it....look forward to 12types of men/boys sorta post now:p

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  49. I belong to the 100% type...ha ha, just kidding. I wanna be Miss Cunningham :D.

    Hey, I second Alka's idea. Tell us about the boy-types now.

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  50. Had gr8 fun reading it. U can categorize girls till U get married. Enjoy Life!

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  51. Haha...ROFL Post..yet again!
    :( But I don't seem to have belonged to any of these categories! Should ask my friends again..probably Jab we met types..but I used to call and waste money and end up my mobile balance! !

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  52. @Uma Uthra 420 means a bad man right... i have a ccepted that Uma :D

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  53. @VaishI must say, i am going to dedicate a 13th kind for you :D lol.. THANKS A TON

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  54. awesome!!!

    loved every bit of this post !

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  55. :D :D :D I started thinking "under which category i'l fall?" :P Had a smile through out the post :)

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  56. " 100%" lovely post - lolled at every line/ word- I am sure this is an impromptu essay:D

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  57. Afetr all those disclaimers and apologies I can't say anything. Just this that between the 11 not-so nice types and the 100% there are scores and scores of others. Hope you find one such, if you haven't already. In fact the last one doesn't exist, she just seems like a 100% to the people who love her.
    Oh and you're so right about Arnab Goswami.
    And now you OWE it to all of us to do a post on the kinds of men. Waiting......

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  58. enjoyed reading... thanks for the info and hillarious titles :)
    cheers!!!
    http://whatsupbollywood.wordpress.com/

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  59. @Obsessivemomhaha you are so cruel :P :D
    hmm you want me to make enemies more? lol
    i would love to do that... sure for your words i ll give my 100% effort to come up with a similar post on MEN:D

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  60. Nope Karthi, Its was jst timepass, more over we all four met after some 5 months or so...

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  61. Solradhellam sollitu. 100 percent lucky nu you concluded. Nice Read:-)

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  62. WHO DRIVE U TO WRITE THIS??!! Ur FRnd or gf??! :P :P

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  63. funny read, i appreciate your attempt to understand women keep going Deepak

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  64. Well researched and extremely funny :D Loved it !!!

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  65. Ok! first and foremost that was funny!! Very creative and made for a great read!!!

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  66. lol lol lol :P =))
    Cant stop laughing at this post :D :P.
    Nice description ;) :D. I hope someone comes and gives you nice beatings :P :P.

    BTW which category do I belong to? o.O :P

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  67. Funny post :) I'm all of them depends on the situation :) cant be nice or bad all the time and everyone is not the same with each person they meet. Some people see different sides of me. Close friends get to see how childish i can be. Hangers on or Chipkus as u call them see how indifferent i can be. Good conversationalists can see how interested i can be. Show offs can see how show off(ie) :) i can be so on and so forth i'm sure u get the idea :) but a nice post Enjoyed it. Humorous hope its taken in fun and not seriously everyone will enjoy it then :)

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  68. superb...actually i want to post something like this.. but u did better...good work... me too did some illicit do's..but this is too good..

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  69. This the second post I'm reading of yours and I must say you're hilarious! I'm glad to see not many people took offence or misinterpreted your style. Well done boss!

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  70. girls fall into many other categories than just these 12.
    anyways, interesting read. you held my attention(which normally wavers :P)

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  71. Well, these are real life categories, to be honest.But I guess, men do fit into these categories, for I have seen extremely mean and irritating(not to mention crappy) men in my life. The ultimate fact is-To error is human(irrespective of gender), to forgive is God! The best way would be to stay away from those crappy characters in life :)

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  72. really really funny..:D :D.. these kind of girls exist... Kudos to your research work..:)

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  73. Dai deepak... i think u ve experienced in dealing with all sort of girls :D really funny one da :D enjoyed it :)

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  74. எல்லாத்தையும் சொல்லிட்டு நல்ல புள்ள மாறி இதுக்கு நான் காரணம் இல்லை. சமூகம் தான்னு சொன்ன எப்படி பாஸ்...உக்காந்து ஒன்பது வருஷம் படிச்சு ஆராய்ச்சி பண்ணி எழுதுனது மாறியே தெரீது.. அதுலயும் அந்த பனிரெண்டாவது பாயிண்ட் நீங்க ரொம்ப நல்லவருன்னு காட்டுது....

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  75. My god..Your posts are so wonderful!! :):)

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  76. Interesting post, ROFL-inspiring! :D good start to the day!

    Do stop by my blog sometime :)

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  77. Still I feel you have missed some catagories...

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  78. How much you would have thought before naming these characters and all. Married women? I don't find them here. Ah, maybe all these characters might be married or not? Yes?

    Thanks for leading me here.

    Joy always,
    Susan

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  79. Bang On Dude! I mean that was the best I read ever! Lovely!!

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Thanks a Ton for your words :) Keep visiting :)